Tuesday, November 16, 2010

How to Rate Lawyers

Ben, a generous facebook correspondent, suggests I post the Wombat Lawyer Evaluation System in the spirit of public service:

Their lawyer--an ambulance-chasing, bloodsucking, amoral, system-gaming bit of pond scum, whose greed and evil menaces all honest people, assaults common sense and restricts human freedom. To blame for the plagues of political correctness, outsourcing to China and mediocre supermarket sushi. Unscrupulous,dishonest and,in general, a poopyhead.

Your lawyer--a stalwart defender of the little guy attacked by an immoral system and those foul enough to, in its service, strive to deny him his rights, compensation and justice. Valiantly and selflessly protecting him from vicious, unprincipled attack on behalf of the public good. The last bulwark of liberty before unjust, tyrannous assault.

Glad I could clear that up for you...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Mediocre supermarket sushi is worse than 10,000 Hitlers dipped in Pol Pot sauce.

ProfWombat said...

And even worse than Alberto Gonzales' tenure as attorney general, L. Ron Hubbard's prose, and disco music...